My name is Emery Flynn. I go by Flynn. He was born on October 12, 2015. I prefer he/him pronouns. I am gender fluid. I am still exploring my gender identity.
I prefer masculine clothes because I feel they express my gender best, but there are days I like to look pretty.
I have bought new clothes and cologne. I have started styling my hair differently. Tomorrow I’m actually getting my hair cut which I’m excited and nervous about.
This didn’t happen overnight. I slowly built to this new identity. I started by accepting that I could be gender fluid. I looked at groups Facebook and Google. Reading blogs and watching Youtube videos.
After I accepted that the term gender fluid fit me, I started talking to people who were gender fluid, transgender, or other non-binary identity. I wanted to learn how they experienced they gender identities and learn how they learned about their gender expression.
Once I became comfortable with the information, I wanted to try to start smelling like a guy. I went to the store with my girlfriend and checked out a couple of deodorants. We settled Speedstick Ocean Surf. She recommended that I buy an out from the mens clothes section. I bought mens underwear, jeans, and a shirt. The deodorant was nice, but didn’t make me smell quite how I wanted so I also bought Old Spice Pure Sport.
When I came home and put the underwear on, it was such an amazing feeling! I felt so giddy. They fit and felt good. It was like what I had been looking for. I put on my new pants and shirt and felt like I could be a guy!
I slowly started referring to myself in my head as he. The other day I referred to myself as he, when talking to a friend. That’s when I decided that I wanted to be referred to by he/him by my friends and family. My situation is a little different which one of the great things about gender fluidity is. With my husband, I still prefer she/her pronouns because with him I feel feminine in our relationship. I love being his wife and I feel those pronouns honor me. For other relationships, I go by other pronouns to fit my role. The pronoun one person goes by doesn’t have to fit their sex or gender expression; it’s whatever honors them the best.
I’m still figuring a lot of this out, but I think I’m doing pretty well so far. Please ask me any questions. I really would like any advice or to help anyone who needs it or make friends along the way.